Sex, Embarrassing and Fantasy: Love comes quickly

Love comes quickly

By Anonymous - 20/07/2022 04:00

Today, my girlfriend dressed as Black Widow in a professionally-made skintight suit for our anniversary and even dyed her hair red. I was so turned on I did something I’ve never, ever done before: I orgasmed in my pants before she even touched me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 143

You deserved it 608

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Same thing different taste

By BadBribe - 24/06/2009 19:15 - United States

Today, my girlfriend decided to bribe me to be good since we were going out to dinner with her parents by giving me blowjob. The good news: it was one of the best she had ever given. The bad news: I came on her black dress. She responded by hitting in me in the nuts. Hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 113

You deserved it 30 169

By Anonymous - 30/04/2013 18:24 - United States - Pompton Plains

Today, I got home from work and found my girlfriend waiting for me in some skimpy lingerie. She ended up pushing me onto the bed, and as I lay there, expecting to be pleasured, she pulled out a pair of adult-sized footsie pajamas and dressed me in them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 946

You deserved it 8 433

By wetsheets - 07/01/2013 13:01 - United Kingdom - Cardiff

Today, my partner was inspired by 50 Shades Of Grey to try making me orgasm with a full bladder, therefore intensifying the experience. He was right, it was mind blowing. It also made me piss the bed for the first time in twenty-odd years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 020

You deserved it 7 684

By anonymous - 03/06/2013 04:41 - United States - Banner Elk

Today, feeling the need to spice things up in our sex life, I dressed up in my husband's navy uniform jacket, hat, and a pair of heels. When he came into the room, he took one look at me and started laughing uncontrollably. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 923

You deserved it 18 292

Bondage prank [GONE SEXUAL]

By ldn - 21/03/2013 17:54 - Slovenia - Domzale

Today, my girlfriend confided in me that she wanted to try bondage. Since I trust her, I said sure. After I was tied to the bed, she tickled me until I pissed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 721

You deserved it 12 976

Why not?

By Anonymous - 02/01/2009 15:53 - France

Today, my girlfriend confessed to me that she wants to dress me up in her clothes, with a wig and makeup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 246

You deserved it 5 557

Great idea for a fun night

By Anonymous - 10/08/2023 14:00 - Spain - Salamanca

Today, to my surprise, my girlfriend accepted to try bondage, despite not being particularly turned on by it. I understood why when, after she firmly tied me up to the bed, she ate 80% of the two-person cake we bought for dinner. In front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 437

You deserved it 309

Sounds hot

By oops999 - 19/11/2013 19:46 - United States - Downingtown

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to have sex. To set the mood, she suggested we watch a porno she once starred in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 991

You deserved it 9 471

By ClaireBear150 - 20/09/2012 03:09 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying on one of my little black dresses and heels. He wanted to "see what the fuss was about." I would have been angry if the sight of him dressed like this hadn't turned me on more than he ever has in the 3 years we've been dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 841

You deserved it 6 156

By Anonymous - 11/09/2009 17:04 - United States

Today, I went to my girlfriend's and she was wearing some sexy lingerie. After making out passionately for 10 minutes, I started to undress myself, only to have her stop me, confessed that she still wasn't sexually attracted to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 265

You deserved it 4 007

mcsmee 7

Wednesday 20 July 2022 4:40

Probably saved your life. You do know that black widows kill the male after completing the sex act, right?

D J's MOM 17

Wednesday 20 July 2022 12:28

I just hope you were still able to take care of her.

Comments

mcsmee 7

Wednesday 20 July 2022 4:40

Probably saved your life. You do know that black widows kill the male after completing the sex act, right?

D J's MOM 17

Wednesday 20 July 2022 12:28

I just hope you were still able to take care of her.

Kr3m 5

Sunday 24 July 2022 5:12

Why wouldn't he be? That's just 5-10 minutes of foreplay and he should be ready to go again.

BurnInDemonFire 33

Wednesday 20 July 2022 15:49

The one time Hulk didn't get to smash.

idragosani 14

Wednesday 27 July 2022 19:10

FWIW, I would have too

xaddrus 17

Saturday 2 September 2023 2:13

hopefully she took it as a good sign!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I found out why my mother has treated me like dogshit since the day I was born. I was apparently born during a solar eclipse, which in her twisted mind meant I was born evil, with a black soul. I train dogs for blind people, yet she insists I must have a sinister motive even for that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 666

You deserved it 54

Today, feeling attractive, I got dressed up and took myself to a trendy bar to enjoy some cocktails. A muscular, handsome man approached me and we began to flirt. He recommended that we get a hotel room, which we did. After we had the most amazing sex of my life, he started to tell me his price. He was an escort. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 942

You deserved it 563

The Top

Today, after 8 months of horrific insomnia, I finally got an appointment with a sleep specialist. His advice? "Google it, download this free app, and call me in 5 months if it gets worse." I haven't slept more than 4 hours uninterrupted since 2022. I'll be lucky to be alive in 5 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 814

You deserved it 101

Today, I walked past two guys on the street. I heard one of them whisper, "Jeez, that girl looks like Donald Trump." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 550

You deserved it 3 897

Today, my daughter asked me if we could adopt a child. I said no, since we can't afford to support another child. She then asked me if she could just adopt another dad instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 130

You deserved it 2 136

Today, I got a rose from my boyfriend. The card read, "It's over." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 566

You deserved it 2 709

Today, I laughed so hard at a show, I threw up all over myself. The show in question? iCarly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 272

You deserved it 692

Today, not only did my ex-wife take everything in our divorce, my most recent lottery ticket was off by only one number, I would have won millions and she wouldn’t have been entitled to a penny. Oh well, back to sleeping in my caravan, which is all I have left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 920

You deserved it 145