Miscellaneous: Today, at the urinal a guy came up next to me to do his business.... - FML

By toosmall - 31/01/2009 21:40 - United States

Today, at the urinal a guy came up next to me to do his business. He stared over at me, looked down, laughed and then left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 605

You deserved it 2 605

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Same thing different taste

By longest minute - 25/05/2016 11:28 - United States - Cypress

Today, I was peeing in a public bathroom when a guy walked in and passed by 4 open urinals to use the one next to mine. After feeling his gaze for a second, I confronted him with my own, in hopes he would stop. Instead, I stared into a stranger's eyes until I finished peeing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 723

You deserved it 2 668

Stranger danger

By Anonymous - 20/11/2014 16:35 - United States - Calhoun

Today, while using a public toilet, a guy started pissing beside me at the urinal. The breach of bathroom etiquette then escalated to him taking a long look down at me and saying, "Nice sack, dude." followed by him finishing up and leaving without even washing his hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 555

You deserved it 2 812

By hardee fucking har yourself, sir - 07/08/2013 22:00 - United Kingdom - Stockport

Today, a guy started taking a leak beside me at the urinal. Evidently he figured he wasn't being enough of a cockbite, because he looked at my junk, laughed, "HAH!" then broke down into hysterics and totally lost control of his stream. I smell like piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 589

You deserved it 4 048

By webperson04 - 27/07/2009 19:07 - United States

Today, I was peeing in a urinal at a bar. A drunk guy comes in, and seeing no urinals open, he decides to pee between my legs from behind me. He didn't have good aim. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 413

You deserved it 3 602

Dude! Boundaries!

By devinbyrne - 05/03/2011 20:26 - United States

Today, I was in the bathroom, when someone came up behind me. Instead of waiting for a urinal to free up, he wedged his way in between me and another guy, and promptly began peeing in my urinal, crossing streams in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 732

You deserved it 3 758

By DrewK - 14/05/2013 20:09 - United States - Great Falls

Today, I went into the men's restroom and started peeing in a urinal next to a middle-age man. As he zipped up and walked away, he said to me, "Don't worry, it'll grow." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 880

You deserved it 4 525

By Anonymous - 26/09/2011 18:52 - United States

Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 048

You deserved it 3 548

By grossedout - 01/02/2015 23:10 - United States - Newport News

Today, I witnessed a man masturbate into a public urinal, miss, fart, and then leave without washing his hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 281

You deserved it 2 750

By Anonymous - 25/01/2011 02:33 - United States

Today, while at the urinal doing my business, my trousers fell all the way to the ground. As I bent down to pull them back up, my boss walked in the bathroom and thought I was mooning him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 954

You deserved it 3 808

By not cool - 28/06/2013 05:16 - Australia - Sunnybank

Today, while using a urinal in a very busy mall bathroom, another man unzipped his pants and attempted to use the same one as me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 809

You deserved it 3 177

Next

Top comments

beansgc 0

Friday 20 February 2009 5:49

why was he looking at your **** anyway?

overachiever 0

Sunday 28 June 2009 22:39

Don't worry about it. You know what they say. Good things come in small packages!

Comments

DamnDatFML 0

Saturday 26 June 2010 18:08

What did 2 say I can't see it....

zachjack 0

Sunday 19 September 2010 1:30

mi dick is 27 inches!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NON ERRECT!

Super_Salo 0

Sunday 25 September 2011 4:15

Maybe he laughed because of how small his was in comparison? (?_´)?

faithlashay 0

Monday 23 January 2012 19:49

Isn it guy code not to look at eachother in the bathroom..lol(:

FUCKTARD_HATER 15

Friday 5 August 2016 6:02

Yup article 30 and 33 (30: no comparing junk sizes. 33: a guy looks straight ahead while using an urinal) source the bro code by Barney Stinson (Neil Patrick Harris) and Matt Kuhn

chacko448 3

Thursday 24 May 2012 3:28

HE GOT DAT SHRIMP DICK

MattKing4665 2

Saturday 26 May 2012 7:46

This is one of the most rude things I've ever heard of..

irritatedone 5

Friday 28 September 2012 19:42

Well did you get a good look at his too? How big was it? Why in the world would you not look back at him?

whos_ur_daddy1 19

Monday 11 March 2013 22:16

His name says it all...

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The Top

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, he started playing with my nipples. Suddenly he stops kissing me, looks at my nipples and says, "Have they always been like this? They look like joysticks!" He then started singing the Super Mario Brothers theme song and playing the game with my nipples. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 803

You deserved it 5 852

Today, my new neighbor asked if I could keep my dog from yapping during the evenings, because it kept him awake last night. I don't have a dog, but I apologized anyway. I didn't have the heart to admit that those are the sounds my girlfriend makes during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 976

You deserved it 8 488

The Top

Today, my girlfriend of 3 months got mad at me because I thought she was attractive. She has an identical twin, and she says if I think she's attractive, I must want her twin too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 987

You deserved it 2 538

Today, at a ski resort, I tried to impress an attractive girl on the slopes and failed, horribly. I ended up with a mild concussion and some serious cuts after tripping, tumbling and hitting my head against the ground. I don't think she was impressed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 754

You deserved it 11 115

Today, my girlfriend called me an "obsessive weirdo" for always checking the chamber on my handgun whenever I pick it up. The last time I let her touch it, she mishandled it and shot a hole in the floor. Glad she's learned her lesson. FML

I agree, your life sucks 835

You deserved it 264

Today, I sneezed so hard that I threw my back out. Now my back is in agonizing pain, and I can barely walk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 151

You deserved it 4 986

Today, I'm a ticket inspector on a train. A suspiciously-acting guy of about 30 gets on board with two huge bags. Worried, I keep an eye on him. I wasn't disappointed when he got 5 furry toys out of his bags and started to have a conversation with them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 502

You deserved it 47

Today, as I opened my diary to write a new entry, I noticed that every page had little side notes about what I had written. It had an extra long note on the page where I wrote about losing my virginity in great detail. All of the notes ended with "Love, Mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 932

You deserved it 9 016