Dogs, Farts and Animals: Bad omen

Bad omen

By Anonymous - 17/11/2013 13:34 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have our first kiss with each other, but my dog decided to let one rip, stinking up the whole room. My boyfriend still doesn't believe it was my dog who did it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 794

You deserved it 4 352

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By aaalias34 - 26/02/2010 11:13 - United States

Today, my dog farted. Immediately, he turned around to sniff his stink then furiously licked his butthole. He then licked my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 986

You deserved it 8 455

By silentbutdeadly - 27/04/2009 22:04 - United States

Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend. His dog, Baxter, has a bad farting problem. I decided it would be okay to let a silent fart out and blame the dog. Baxter was outside when I blamed him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 995

You deserved it 77 605

By Puppy problems - 27/10/2013 01:23 - United States - Essex Junction

Today, I invited my boyfriend over to meet my new puppy. My dog decided to take a dump on his lap. He is now not talking to me because he thinks I trained my dog to do that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 523

You deserved it 4 507

Blame the pooch

By anamota89 - 11/05/2012 09:33 - United States

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. I had to fart really badly, so thinking that he wouldn't hear me, I did so. He heard me and asked, "Did you fart?" I said "No, it was my dog." I don't have a dog, and he knows this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 336

You deserved it 32 285

By SHIT-BREATH - 05/06/2013 16:03 - United Kingdom - Chepstow

Today, my puppy came into my room, and I cupped his head in my hands and bent down to kiss him. As I did, I realized that the part of his head I was kissing was covered in his own shit that he'd seemingly been rolling in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 490

You deserved it 15 109

The Taste of Love

By Anonymous - 05/04/2020 14:00

Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 486

You deserved it 308

By mandygeegoesnom - 29/02/2012 05:30 - United States

Today, while waiting for my boyfriend to get out of the shower, I chatted with his grandma. As soon as we hear him exit the restroom, she smirks at me and lets a huge, smelly fart out. She blamed it on me. My boyfriend believed her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 134

You deserved it 2 530

By Anonymous - 30/08/2015 00:06 - Canada - Newmarket

Today, I found dog poop in my room that had probably been there for days. My girlfriend, who was watching the house, said she didn't realize it was there, because she thought it was the smell of her own farts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 694

You deserved it 2 201

By Username - 10/08/2011 12:36 - United States

Today, my boyfriend leaned over and sniffed me like a dog. He does this almost every day, even in front of people sometimes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 544

You deserved it 7 145

By Anonymous - 29/01/2013 04:44 - United States

Today, I was telling my boyfriend how proud I am of him for finding a really good job. He interrupted me to tell me that my breath smelled like his cat's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 389

You deserved it 8 853

eddeeezzyy 19

Sunday 17 November 2013 19:14

The ultimate **** block.

FML64128 7

Sunday 17 November 2013 19:13

That stinks.

Comments

trolled11 8

Monday 18 November 2013 5:07

thats a bitch move

elcee1987 18

Monday 18 November 2013 6:25

Guess that killed the mood

mjt123 7

Monday 18 November 2013 9:24

Dog's thoughts: Haha she's with her boyfriend! Let's stink up the whole room and embarrass her! *poops* Your thoughts: OH FML! Boyfriend's thoughts: EWWWWW DID YOU JUST POOP?!?!

srod1326 5

Monday 18 November 2013 10:14

So he's your bf but have yet to kiss? Weird.

Kifly95 4

Monday 18 November 2013 10:44

That's what you get for dating an asshole smh I bet he's already kissed many other girls

graphicstyle7 17

Monday 18 November 2013 11:39

Past the age of 16, if your "boyfriend" has not kissed you by the third date, consider your address the Friend Zone. Or the "just doing it for now until something better comes along" zone. It's one thing if he really is so into you he's too shy to kiss you, but that's kinda what dating is for, it's a go-ahead to do things like kiss. Dog fart? Either you're very young, or that's a very lame excuse.

guitarst1071995 12

Monday 18 November 2013 15:20

I still don't believe it was your dog

mk8833 9

Monday 18 November 2013 20:48

Damn. Well maybe if he comes around & believes you later it will be cool. But if he really doesn't want you after this fart incident, he's not worth your time.