Health: Today, I realized that if you are dreaming that you have diarrhea,...

By crap - 17/01/2014 16:24 - United States - Mansfield

Today, I realized that if you are dreaming that you have diarrhea, you probably have diarrhea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 066

You deserved it 4 423

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Same thing different taste

By rj93 - 05/11/2011 13:43 - United Kingdom

Today, I learned if you dream you're having a piss, you most likely are having a piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 372

You deserved it 5 847

Number one or number two?

By Anonymous - 25/09/2023 13:00 - Australia

Today, I found out that the myth about what happens when you dream you're going to the toilet is not entirely untrue. At least for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 582

You deserved it 73

No shit

By Anonymous - 26/03/2022 11:00 - Australia - Aspley

Today, I had a dream that I was having one of the best poops of my life. I woke up feeling very content and relaxed, until I rolled over and realised it wasn't a dream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 917

You deserved it 213

You sleep in your pants?

By Anonymous - 01/03/2021 18:30 - United States - Randolph

Today, I dreamt that I was using the toilet. The toilet was a dream, but the rest wasn't. My pants were soaked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 805

You deserved it 154

Geometry

By sickpuppy - 08/09/2019 12:00

Today, I learned the hard way that when sick, throw up, then have diarrhea. Not the other way round. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 418

You deserved it 164

By Anonymous - 21/11/2015 10:03 - United States - Norwalk

Today, I was house-sitting for my friend. He was late to return and I ended up falling asleep on the couch and having a dream where I violently shat myself and suddenly developed a six-pack. When I woke up, I found the dream was half true. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 035

You deserved it 2 310

Nearly did a Jimi Hendrix

By Courtney - 30/10/2022 14:00

Today, I had a dream in which I was throwing up. Turns out it wasn’t a dream and I woke up to puke all over the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 811

You deserved it 109

Two states of matter

By Anonymous - 15/09/2020 05:02 - Germany

Today, I learned that is it possible to be constipated and have diarrhea at the same time. You run to the toilet every half-hour, but almost nothing comes out and you feel so bloated you could burst, while eating almost nothing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 366

You deserved it 139

By Anonymous - 26/09/2018 23:00 - United States - Perrysburg

Today, I got random constipation followed by diarrhea. It's 1:30am and my sleeping medication is making me fall asleep, but every time I try to get off the toilet I get another diarrhea spasm. Either I fall asleep on the toilet or shit myself in my sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 982

You deserved it 222

By Anonymous - 22/09/2018 13:30

Today, I apparently had diarrhea in my sleep. I had to get up and sneak to the bathroom so as to not wake my husband. When he asked about the stain, I panicked and told him I started my period. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 580

You deserved it 418

lilmslady 11

Friday 17 January 2014 21:12

I guess dreams really do come true

leroyjenkins006 10

Friday 17 January 2014 21:11

Let the brown rivers flow

Comments

tranced_ 45

Friday 17 January 2014 21:22

I hope you weren't day dreaming ..

zahidnasir 22

Friday 17 January 2014 21:22

another type of wet dream

leary96 15

Friday 17 January 2014 21:22

Whole new meaning to wet dream.

Opheliae 22

Friday 17 January 2014 21:23

Looks like somebody......... shit the bed with this one.

perdix 29

Friday 17 January 2014 21:24

And if you dream that you're sinking in quicksand, you've had a LOT of diarrhea!

hickdog 6

Saturday 18 January 2014 13:59

LOL good one

squarecircles 13

Friday 17 January 2014 21:26

Dare I? K here it goes. That's a shitty situation! Ha ha ha! Running away quickly now...

dachayke 16

Friday 17 January 2014 23:01

You had better run!

rockhead1270 5

Friday 17 January 2014 21:33

Ain't that the *****

OperationAxis 10

Friday 17 January 2014 21:35

Happened to me too... Had to learn the hard way

MortenM 17

Saturday 18 January 2014 0:30

Is reading this FML contagious? Oh shit

SmokinGuns 13

Friday 17 January 2014 21:37

I'm sorry, but that made me laugh. FYL.

auro7 18

Friday 17 January 2014 21:38

Taking wet dreams to the next level.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I found out that my soon-to-be ex-wife had installed a Ring front door camera. The way I found out was when the PowerPoint presentation I was supposed to present at work started with the footage of me taking my girlfriend to the house when my wife wasn’t around. The next slide said, “Call your lawyer.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 62

You deserved it 1 424

Today, at work in a liquor store, a man came in to demand a refund because after he "drank the whole bottle of Jack" he "couldn't get it up" for his wife. He thought that alcohol was supposed to be an aphrodisiac, and blamed me personally for his "whiskey dick". FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 985

You deserved it 3 134

The Top

Today, I was yelled at by a bunch of angry people because I couldn't physically move out of the way while 10 more tried to force their way onto a subway in Shanghai. Then one old lady started hitting me with her purse to get me to move even more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 930

You deserved it 2 065

Today, I got hit by a car walking to work. My first thought wasn't to call 911 or my husband, but to call work to let them know I wouldn't be able to make it in for my shift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 015

You deserved it 98

Today, I spent two hours making dinner for my boyfriend's family. When I brought it over to their house they said "thanks" and didn't bother to invite me to stay to eat it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 253

You deserved it 4 588

Today, I was moving to my new apartment. I left some furniture outside as I drove to dump the first load at my new place. When I got back, everything was gone. Apparently, today is the day the donation truck was coming around to take everything we don't need. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 748

You deserved it 25 191

Today, I took a crap. When I stood up to admire my handiwork and flush, I noticed blood-red everywhere in the toilet. I freaked out like a little girl, thinking I was bleeding out of my ass. Then I noticed the ketchup packets my roommate had slipped under the seat to prank me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 888

You deserved it 6 632

Today, I’ve been battling an aggressive form of cancer for the past 3 years. Due to the financial strain, I started a GoFundMe. I’m grateful for what I got, but a friend also started one for her dog’s surgery and got thousands of dollars. Guess the dog is more important than my kids having a mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 176

You deserved it 185

Same thing different taste

Number one or number two?

No shit

You sleep in your pants?

Geometry

Nearly did a Jimi Hendrix

Two states of matter

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